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[164242] Artist: megdoll | Title: St-st-starry Eyed (Audition number 1) | Time: 3h 39m
Pic #87761

ShiPainter Pro
(Public)
megdoll Monday, January 17th 2011, 4:50 AM
Hit hit hit hit hit me with lightning.

Why hello!
I'm kiwi. This is my first audition piece. I'm not really experienced with oekaki programs. The last time I used them was a good 5 years ago.

Rhyu Monday, January 17th 2011, 5:59 AM
I really like what you did with the upper part of her hair, your shading on her chest is also really neat in the way you executed it.

There is a bit of weirdness going on in the anatomy though, especially in the arms. Her right arm (the one on the left) is really long (due to her putting it behind her like that you'd have some shortening effects so the general rule that arms go down to mid thigh no longer applies), the hand/wrist is also really large and thick. Its thicker than her upper arm and should behind her still due to the way her butt blocks her arm. The other arm is bending at an impossible angle. I'm really flexible and I cannot get my hand to lie that flat from that angle.

Also, in general, it looks like you're trying to hide the elbows to avoid drawing them. This may not have been your purpose, but with the way the bend of the elbows is off in both it really makes it seem like you are not comfortable drawing joints. You've done the same thing with the legs, avoiding the knees and all.

The general torso and face anatomy is pretty good though, stylized, but good. The only thing there is that her head is too large for the width of her body.

The shading is both nice and a little flawed, mainly in terms of light source. Its not consistent, most of the picture is back lit, but her face and chest are...not. I'm not really sure where the light is from on her face. You also don't have any cast/drop shadows (eg. hair casting shadow on face, arm blocking light from reaching waist, etc etc. Its cool you've tried to integrate weak color lighting, however, due to its weak nature it only shows up in shadowed regions (eg, it does not have the strength to "overtake" the main light-source, you only see it in shadowed regions). The purple lights are correct for the most part, the blue is not, the major lightsource would have to be blue (and therefore the who image blue tinged) for there to be bright blue light on the forward edge.

Gyarados Monday, January 17th 2011, 6:39 AM
avatar
hmm yeah the proportions are off at certain places like the head (and the hips, to me) and the others like Rhyu said.
and i feel that the lighting/shading should be harsher, looking at that background.
good luck on your second though!


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